Dogfight

I've always had an unwavering belief that I could fight at least two dogs of any breed at the same time. I never really understood what the big deal was. I probably started thinking this when Merghast  told me that Zangief got all his scars from fighting bears in Russia.

Now, fighting bears is pretty badass. I didn't think I could handle bears. But dogs? Oh hell yeah, I could take dogs.

The reason people err in thinking that two pitbulls would prove problematic is there hesitancy to strike man's best friend. I've looked forward to fighting dogs for quite some time now, so I'm hoping I wouldn't hesitate to stomp the hell out of some K-9's.

Will I come from this encounter unscathed? Of course not. I'll probably be covered in my own blood. But fighting two dogs won't be like fighting a snake.

My mind recoils at even the thought of trying to take down any type of snake. I mean, the way they snake around and do all their snaky stuff? How can you even tell where to land your strike when they're being all slithery?

If there were a snake in my bed I would just hold my breath until I died.

Whenever I'm at a zoo, snakes try to hypnotize me into getting into their little cages. The only thing that saves me is looking at my palm, where I've thought to write "HUMAN" beforehand.

Now that I'm thinking about it, dogs have never given me any trouble, so I'd probably only fight them as a last resort.

Whereas snakes have always plagued me in some fashion. I saw a snake giving me a parking ticket once, but I was so terrified I just walked past my car and went into that little Peanut Shoppe on the corner. How anyone can argue against a snake is beyond me. I bet that snake could have unhinged its jaw and....nevermind. I can't express how difficult it was to type that last sentence, even.

Maybe I would have to go to the dogs to ask for their help in defeating the snakes, but before they would take me in, I would have to fight two of them.

People would assume snakes killed my parents and I would just go on allowing them to think that. Or something like that, like maybe a snake ran off with my first love, or swallowed all my babies. I would never say.

I'm not really sure how adept dogs are at fighting snakes. But I think I'd get further with the mongooses if I came with my dog friends.  

What price would the mongooses exact for their help?

Any price, as far as I'm concerned.

Unless they had to turn me into a snake in order to fight other snakes. I don't think I could live with that.