Gable Doesn't Drink Coffee

I hate when people watch me. It's really just super annoying. If someone is watching me do something, I kind of just jam up. I've dumped an entire filter full of coffee grounds onto the floor just because someone paused to watch me make a pot. What the hell?

It's hard for me to explain this to people when they're already dealing with all the other shit that makes me crazy: please stop chewing, it sounds like you're eating a baby.

It's especially hard to explain this to a bandit from Devils' Bay named Gable who speaks Common. Common sounds like English and German, if English and German were drunk and covered with a blanket. That being said, I understood most of what he was saying. But trying to ask someone who affiliated themselves with a group called the Blade Bound Brothers to not stare at you while you went through the day's mail? Not hardly.

When I came into Mods today one of the ladies from OADS was standing outside the door with Gable. This was pre-coffee so I didn't instantly recognize the dirty face with the awful scar cleaved into it as something from my stable. Apparently Gable had wandered in early and started knocking on doors (so he wasn't totally a brute) and this petite specimen from across the hall had opened the door. I didn't know exactly how long she'd been dealing with him, but before I could open my mouth she flashed her palms and said, "He's yours," and left us both standing there, stupidly. "Aw, Jesus."

So now I'm going through all the fan mail and trying to drink my coffee, Gable seems to have little to do except sit across from me and watch. I was trying to use body language that suggested this made me uncomfortable, but I wasn't getting it across to him. Usually Atta did the mail, but ever since a devoted fan wrote that he'd "...dash the universe to drink the crimson honey from your shoes..." I've been taking care of it.

When Atta came in this morning she just shook her head.

"Ah-Jezus!" Gable greeted her, then grinned and winked luridly at me. I tried to shake my head but he just nodded knowingly and put his finger to his lips in the universal Yeah-Gotcha-Keep-It-On-The-Down-Low.

Now as I look up and see his sword belt hanging next to my overcoat I'm wondering how long he's planning on staying. But I don't want to be rude. To a bandit that I made up in my goddam head.
"Gable, why don't you look at the paper while I finish up here and then we'll get you something to eat...before you go," I say, handing it over to him.

I was a little surprised that he actually sat back and started looking it over. Well, whatever.

Ahh, coffee.

"What is 'fiscal cliff'?"

Ahh, fuck.

"I don't really know. Just...posturing, I think, really." You try translating "posturing" into Common. For someone who always had to work within the politics between Devils' Bay and Banda Cate, this wasn't a strange concept for Gable.

"And Nra?"

"'Nra'? Lemme see that. Oh, no..N-R-A. They're like the Blade Bound Brothers but with guns. Rifles? Very powerful weapons. You know that magic sword Hooter Deeza supposedly had? Well, the NRA thinks everyone should be able to have a magic sword like that. Hey, don't look at me, I think it's stupid, too."

"These are your leaders?" holding the paper up.

"Yeah, basically."

"They are... not...they have no scars."

Well, I couldn't disagree with him there. "We don't really do things by the tip of a sword anymore, Gable."

"Maybe you should."

Well.

"Do you want some coffee?"

"No, I want whatever this is, how do you say that?"

"'Kardashian'."

Damnit, Gable. I have deadlines.