"Egotistical Peacock"

I'm happy that the Prequels happened because now that they've happened, we don't have to worry about making them happen anymore. I'm happy that we're going to get more Star Wars and soon. I need Star Wars to give me that feeling that I get when something really special is happening. I don't mean like...watching something be born or any of that bullshit. I'm talking about when the Jurassic Park banner flutters down in front of the T-Rex at the end of said movie. I'm talking about when Peter Parker explodes out of the rubble in pursuit of Doc Ock in Spider-Man 2. I'm talking about the movie magical hard-on.
It's been so long since I've had one. The last time I had one was for "I'm always angry." and before that, Lord knows.
I was watching Transformers: Dark of the Moon and Optimus Prime is getting the shit kicked out of him by Leonard Nemoy and just before the death stroke he whimpers, "please." I'm not a Transformers buff by any means but...Prime saying please? What in the holy fuck lobster was that?
I was watching The Amazing Spider-Man and I felt like I was standing in Hot Topic.
I enjoyed Rises but it doesn't really matter to me if I ever see it again. Not like Dark Knight. I mean, I cry at the end of that one, every time.
And I can promise you whatever Zach Snyder delivers in the way of Superman will be a steaming pile of horse shit. I can tell you exactly when Singer got it wrong: Kent drinking a beer in the bar. I should've gotten up right then. Superman does not have the luxury of being dark. He does not get to have the real world treatment. It's because he's better than us. It's because he's more than we can be.
I didn't even bother going to see The Hobbit. I feel like they green-lighted that because Jackson's got to eat, just like the rest of us. I mean, shipping frigates can only buy copies of King Kong for ballast for so long. If I ever had to hide a body, I'd bury it with a bunch of copies of King Kong over top so that if anyone dug there they'd just stop when they came to that layer.
I think Jack the Giant Slayer actually looks pretty good. For the same reason Blue Steel was good. It was just a movie. It didn't launch some franchise and wasn't a reboot and all the other bullshit. I couldn't even tell you who directed it. Just a movie.
This post's title is brought to you from the G.I. Joe season 1, episode 3 cartoon from 1983. That's all I'll be saying about G. I. Joe.