The Master
The subtitle to this movie could have been Philip Seymour Hoffman Tells Joaquin Phoenix What to do for Two Hours.
WM gives it a Warning Shot
Take This Waltz
Holy shit what an awful movie. It had been a long time since I'd considered masturbating during a movie just to have something to do. I started looking around at the other movie-goers to see if I was missing something. They all seemed rapt. I wasn't getting it. I wished for the death of every character on screen. I hated every stupid fucking....when you're reading this I want you to read this next sentence slowly, like foot falls: I hated every stupid fucking character in that god damned movie. I yearned for it to turn into a snuff film about twenty minutes into it, or whenever I got my first dose of baby talk from the lead female; that's when I wanted the voice-over to say "And now, what you've all been waiting for..."
The director, Sarah Polley, beats us over the head for two hours about seeking true love or what the hell ever, talk about oxymorons. Then when Fuck Face McGee finally leaves her husband for Guy Across the Street, Polley adds another forty minutes to beat us over the head with how wrong it was for Fuck Face to do that. I think the producers made the movie take place in Canada because that stupid ass story line doesn't work in any other country. The only saving grace in the entire film was Sarah Silverman's performance, which you have to trod through six hours of shit to get to, when she's having a moment of lucidity at the end.
WM says Shoot Me and Make Sure I'm Dead
Wreak-It Ralph
Finally. This was an enjoyable movie. It was simple and straight forward and lacking (I think) of any hidden agendas the right are always so worried about. Sure, the voice actors are laregly playing the roles they've been cast in other characters, especially McBrayer and Lynch, but I can live with that, it translates. There's a bit of a slag in the beginning, Ralph seems pretty two-dimensional, but that may be purposeful so we can watch him grow. In the end everything is neatly resolved and there's no cliff hanger, no allusion to a sequel, despite that notion being welcome. Also, another strong performance from Sarah Silverman for the books.
And me? I almost cried. Twice.
WM gladly stamps it with a Right on Target
You are so obvious.
ReplyDeleteFor the record, we had good conversation about The Master afterwards. I think it warrents more than 1 sentence.
Agreed on Take This Waltz. Sarah Silverman's character was the only believable one and no character was likeable. There were some truly cringetastic lines, too. "I'm afraid of being afraid." barf.
ReplyDelete